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Thursday, June 22, 2006

That Insidious Button:

As a public service, I am posting today about something that has seemingly taken over my employer. It is something that has taken over the hearts and minds of many of the staff members. It has affected both hourly and salaried, both American and international, both male and female. And it has shown no signs of being stopped.

But, today, here on this blog, I am going to announce to all the world how to avoid similar situations in your office. I am going to outline a process that could very well save your sanity.

So what is the “something” you may ask. Well, if you did ask, I’m glad you did. Here’s the “something:

The Reply to All Button.

Yes, thousands of emails are sent annually to people who don’t want them, don’t need them, and would love to avoid them. And why? Because some less than brainy individuals decided that it would be a good idea to reply to EVERYONE on a corporate mailing list. All it takes is one stellar individual to mistakenly Reply to All, and that spawns several more stellar individuals responding with such sentiments as “Please remove me from this mailing list” and “Stop sending these emails.” Before you know it, hundreds of myrmidons are hurriedly clicking, you guessed it, Reply to All, and tossing in their own commentary. Thus, we have an internal spam attack on our hands caused by the ineptitude of the wonderful user.

Five divisions. Dozens of central operations. Vendors and subcontractors in all fifty states, and seven countries. These are the destinations of the menacing emails. Just in the last two hours, twenty-three of these doozies have been sent from none other than Monterey, Mexico.

I beam with pride knowing how sophisticated our users are. I am tempted to respond to the sinister note myself by explaining how long it will take to clean up our already overworked Exchange servers, but that would be feeding the beast.

So, today, I am offering you this insight in hope that you can avoid such a debacle in your own organization. Simply do this. Do not click Reply to All. Ever. Under any circumstance. It is evil incarnate. Avoid it. The minuses far outweigh the plusses. And, if you’re feeling especially charitable, lobby your CIO/CFO to allocate extra funds for more Exchange servers. Odds are, if you have users like these, you’re going to need the hardware.

Thank you, and good day.


.: posted by Dave 8:58 AM

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